Post by 1crazytexan on Dec 6, 2013 15:14:23 GMT -6
Hi everyone. I've never actually blogged before, so here it goes.
I am a 26 year old homeschool survivor and I still to this day struggle with some of the things I was raised with. Maybe I always will.
My dad is a Baptist preacher and I was homeschooled my entire life. Made to wear coulottes(if you know what those are then you feel my pain) and skirts until I was 13 and cried and begged to be allowed to wear jeans because I just wanted to be "normal". School consisted of pretty much teaching ourselves after we got to a certain point, because our mom had to learn it along with us. Any time that I would make a "secular" friend, my dad wouldn't approve of them because he didn't like the way they dressed or the things they would say, so despite growing up in a family of 8, I spent a lot of time on my own. Neither parents were very affectionate and even though they were there physically, they were often absent mentally and emotionally. The church always came first for my dad and my mom would escape into anything...mostly internet.
Secular music was not allowed, though we would sneak it as much as we could, because we wanted desperately to be normal.
And forget about boys. I was 18, and anytime that I tried to talk to them, they would check the phone bill to see who I was talking to and put a stop to it. I was supposed to stay home until I was married. That was the expected thing. As a result, I married at 19 into an abusive relationship. I didn't feel like I could tell my dad because divorce was just unheard of, so my brother flew me out to stay with him, and that's when I started to be somewhat free. Even so, I still feel awkward around groups of people, have trouble making close friends, and having healthy relationships with men. They lost my highschool transcripts so in order to go to college I'll have to take my GED. I'be worked extremely hard to be a non judgemental, open minded individual because of my past, and to a point I have succeeded. But I still feel the struggle in everyday life. I was released into a world that I wasn't prepared for and didn't understand, and basically had to raise myself to deal with things that most people grow up knowing.
I now have a daughter of my own, and she is my life...it's sad when you look at your parents as someone you don't want to be to your kids. I want her to be supported in the things she wants to do in life, cause god knows that I never was.
It's nice to know that this forum exists. I needed something like this when I was younger so hopefully it will help all of the others like myself who are trapped. Thank you for listening.
Kyla
I am a 26 year old homeschool survivor and I still to this day struggle with some of the things I was raised with. Maybe I always will.
My dad is a Baptist preacher and I was homeschooled my entire life. Made to wear coulottes(if you know what those are then you feel my pain) and skirts until I was 13 and cried and begged to be allowed to wear jeans because I just wanted to be "normal". School consisted of pretty much teaching ourselves after we got to a certain point, because our mom had to learn it along with us. Any time that I would make a "secular" friend, my dad wouldn't approve of them because he didn't like the way they dressed or the things they would say, so despite growing up in a family of 8, I spent a lot of time on my own. Neither parents were very affectionate and even though they were there physically, they were often absent mentally and emotionally. The church always came first for my dad and my mom would escape into anything...mostly internet.
Secular music was not allowed, though we would sneak it as much as we could, because we wanted desperately to be normal.
And forget about boys. I was 18, and anytime that I tried to talk to them, they would check the phone bill to see who I was talking to and put a stop to it. I was supposed to stay home until I was married. That was the expected thing. As a result, I married at 19 into an abusive relationship. I didn't feel like I could tell my dad because divorce was just unheard of, so my brother flew me out to stay with him, and that's when I started to be somewhat free. Even so, I still feel awkward around groups of people, have trouble making close friends, and having healthy relationships with men. They lost my highschool transcripts so in order to go to college I'll have to take my GED. I'be worked extremely hard to be a non judgemental, open minded individual because of my past, and to a point I have succeeded. But I still feel the struggle in everyday life. I was released into a world that I wasn't prepared for and didn't understand, and basically had to raise myself to deal with things that most people grow up knowing.
I now have a daughter of my own, and she is my life...it's sad when you look at your parents as someone you don't want to be to your kids. I want her to be supported in the things she wants to do in life, cause god knows that I never was.
It's nice to know that this forum exists. I needed something like this when I was younger so hopefully it will help all of the others like myself who are trapped. Thank you for listening.
Kyla